Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Being hyper

Have you ever had one of those days when the weather is perfect? The sun is shining but it's not unbearably hot. There isn't a cloud in the sky and there's a gentle breeze. Dragon flies are buzzing around and all is well with the world.
Undoubtably somethings gonna fuck it up somewhere along the line. But until then you just wish time could stand still so you can enjoy it just a little more.
Well today is one of those days. I love it. Even the cars driving past my gaff are driving quieter than usual.
people are walking in with smiles on their faces. Friends have been in to see me just to say "hi!" Tonight when I went to pick up my boy to play pool he said "I'm worried about you Dad."
"Why's that?"
"You're hyper. You are in too good a mood. You're over the top."
"But it's the perfect day."
"I'm worried."
So he's worried that I'm in a good mood and my life is gliding along and I don't have a care in the world.
I met the ex she was leaving as I arrived, I started talking to her. Very friendly like. Her undertaker boyfriend was cringing in the driving seat of his car.
"Mikel. You're hyper aren't you."
"Not you as well..."
"Take deep breathes and try to calm down."
"I am calm."
"no you're into one of your hyper moods."
"No I'm just happy, it's a perfect day."
"You need help Mikel."
No wonder I divorced her. I'm not allowed to be happy.
..... and old Mrs MacAvoy the cook is going to do a super picnic with lashings of Ginger beer and cake an ev'rythin.
Then later if we're all good mummy will let us stay up late and put a tent up in the garden, and we'll all run around in the dark with torches and have a midnight feast.

I've been talking to Zoe she's been helping me with some technical stuff. No don't laugh. She was playing super sleuth, Inspector Clouseau for me. She's a clever girl. That Zoe. Anyway I asks her all innocent like....
"So what's your evening going to be like? "
"I'm going to watch East Enders."
Well that got me thinking.
Oh no! Not "Stenders" as my children call it. I have a friend who regularly tells me all about it as if I was actually interested. She relates the stories to me with such passion. I say to her "They're just actors you know."
"No but it's true to life though isn't it?"
"No. 16 murders in ten years, three rapes and 17marriages is not true to life if it involves just one family."
I refuse to watch it in case I get sucked in and my mind gets sucked out.
There are those who threaten anyone with death, if they dare to phone you during that half hour of "Stenders". I have friends like that. You dare not phone under any circumstances for fear of a knife in the heart.
"Oh hello I would have phoned you ten minutes ago but I knew you'd be watching East Enders but it's finished now. I just thought you might like to know your house is on fire..... yes huge plumes of smoke coming from the upstairs back window.... firebrigade.... yes I phoned them... asked them to give you ten minutes before they came round. Is that alright?"
I wonder if Corrie fans reach the same levels of fanaticism?

So while Zoe is super sleuthing on my behalf I'm writing notes to her whilst at work. Why isn't she at work? But then.....
I'm the boss of my business I can do what I like. Play Freecell all day if I want. Write letters to people and pretend it's some crucial communiqué to some big multi national corporation. I tell my employees....
"Yes I'm just knocking out a letter to the MD of Merloni International tell him what I think of his new pricing structures."

Dear Zoe
How are you? I'm fine, hope you are the same
Love and kisses

Yes it's a Multimillion pound operation going on here. If only I used the time to realise all that money instead of writing stupid letters to people. But it's a living...........
I wont die rich that's for sure.

Must go Mrs Macavoy is calling she's managed to clean my high chair after yesterdays tea time fiasco with the Spaghetti Bolognese. Why does it always wrap itself round your nose when you suck it? You know that last two inches, and the tomato sauce then drips off your lip onto your lovely white shirt. Who invented dressing for dinner? Were they mad? In my house dressing for dinner would be the last thing you do? Excepting of course if it was a full biological, nuclear and chemical warfare suit. Even then you'd have trouble getting the tomato stains out.

This is for Del he misses his mice. You don't really want me to explain do you? Maybe Del himself will, in the comments box. But he truly misses his mice. I think it may have something to do with Figgy his cat that went missing a while back. Shortly after I spent the weekend Cat sitting. I hope there's no connection there. I'd hate to feel responsible for his cat running away. While cat sitting I had to force antibiotics down the poor things throat. Actually force is such a strong word. The daft cat licked the tablets from my fingers.

Before I go I've got to say I was worried about something Zoe said...
"Your blog is a bit Christian, which is unlike you."
For Chrissakes I'm an athiest. How can my blog be possibly Christian? Unless she used the term to mean something completely different to the "Christian" term I understand. I might have to ask her. Or maybe she'll explain herself personally.

Rock on dudes


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