Thursday, October 07, 2004


My ex, not one normally for funny stories told me this one tonight. She has a friend who's ninety six year old mother was still quite spritely. She was spotted by a couple in the local park struggling to "run away from a nearby rest home for the elderly". They phoned the police, as was their civic duty, and said "there's a very old lady in her pyjamas trying to run away from the rest home."
Very quickly the police arrived and much to the old ladies, protestations, disgust and indignation took her in.
They phoned around all the local rest homes to find out where she came from, all the while she is trying to tell them that the "pyjamas" she was wearing are really jogging trousers and top. She tried to explain that she wasn't running away from any rest home but lived by herself in her own house and she was trying to keep fit by jogging.
So how many of you are shamed by this. Not because the police took her in, but that a ninety six year old women is jogging and you guys aint. I'm 45, I haven't run in over three years. She's more than twice my age. MY idea of heavy physical exercise is lifting a full pint mug to my lips. That and my going for "the burn" with my horizontal slam dancing routine.
My father keeps insisting that you've only got so much energy to last your whole life, so why waste it on exercise? His other theory is you only need to be fit enough for what you do. So if you need to be fit enough to run up and down three flights of stairs you get to that level. There's no point pushing yourself to be fit enough to run a marathon if you don't need to run that far in everyday life.

I took up running five years ago when I had to run for a bus, I got one hundred yards and almost collapsed, I was so out of condition. I felt that I almost died just running those one hundred yards. So I took to gentle exercise then running, then running and swimming. Then I could run two and a half miles, followed by a mile swim, followed by two hours in the pub, undoing all the good. Now I can easily run one hundred yards and not die. But I'm not a fitness fanatic. I can outrun my fifteen year old son who spends his life tied to his computer. I can leave my 19 year old daughter standing. I am not fit. But I am fit for the life style I have. I don't need to be fit enough to run a marathon. I don't need to be fit enough to climb Mount Everest. I just need to be fit enough to do what I have to do.

I am very heartened by the messages of support I've had since my sacking from the band. Not just you guys but personal friends who don't read this. I don't want anyone taking sides. I don't want anyone to be upset for me. This is my problem and I'm cool with it. So you guys don't need to worry. When one door shuts another opens. Life is a challenge. I welcome that challenge. I embrace it with both arms. Bring it on.

Rock on Dudes

iPod now playing - With a litle help from my friends By Joe Cocker


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