Monday, August 22, 2016

Jeremy Corbyn and the drug raids

So it's been an unexpectedly busy day. My local MP came to see me. I've got to say if he wasn't a politician he'd be almost tolerable. You could almost describe him as pleasant. But I steadfastly refuse to talk about politics with him.  So I left out the part where I proclaim Jeremy Corbyn a God amongst men, the new messiah of the people. I bit my tongue instead of telling him he had zero interest in the people and just pandered to his and his ilks pockets. Which I thought would have been a bit hypocritical being as I wanted to empty his wallet for him and trouser the contents.
So then my man came back. Twice in one day. Unheard of. Anyway I took the opportunity to ask  about the implications of grassing up the druggies to the police.
"What me? No it wasn't me who grassed them up."
"But when you were here last week, you hinted that it was you."
"Well maybe indirectly it was me."
"Go on, how does that work?"
"Well remember the guy who was in my garden shed?"
"Yes. The one you kicked out."
"That's him. Well he came back. I was really pissed off with him. Turned out he's a big time druggie and hiding from the police."
"Hardly big time if he's hiding in your bleedin shed."
"Well round here he's a big player, anyway So phoned the Police and let them know where he was hiding. They were round mine in minutes with a little tap on the door, which I opened to find three big burly Policemen. I told them where the shed was and let them go get him. Now he's the one, who when he got nabbed, started singing like a bleedin canary. he was giving out names and addresses and the police just sucked it all up. Then last week they hit. Nine raids in 48 hours. So it wasn't exactly me who grassed them up but the guy in my shed."
"OK"
"But get this, there's a twist. The guy who was hiding in my shed has a sister, she's pretty skanky, Last night the Police were round my house looking for her as well. She's done a runner."
"What for? Is she one of the major players?"
"Nah she's just a skankie druggie. They want her for breaking and entering."

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