Friday, January 21, 2005

Mrs Mad Woman

Mrs Mad Woman came into the shop with her lamp we'd fixed the day before. "Why have you changed the colour of my lamp"
"We haven't we've just repaired it. It was a broken wire."
"Yes you have. This was all Brass and now it's silver."
"That's how you brought it in."
"Don't you tell me how I brought it in. I've owned this lamp for 40 years I should know by now what colour it should be and it shouldn't be silver."
"But for what possible reason would we want to change it?"
"Well I don't know, but you have."
"It's impossible, we can't get spares for new lamps never mind lamps bought in the USA 40 years ago. So even if we wanted to deliberately change your lamp to another colour where would we get the bits?"
"I don't know that. All I know is I want you to put back the bits you've taken off."
"But we haven't taken anything off."
"It's silver do you think I'm stupid not to notice?"
"In forty years?"

Mrs Mad Woman II came in yesterday.
"The man didn't come."
"What man?"
"The plumber."
"We don't have any plumbers. We're electricians."
"I know but he said he be here first thing this morning."
"But it's only 9:15am and you are here. He's probably at your house now looking for you."
"I've been waiting four hours for him."
"What since five this morning?"
"He said he'd be early. Can you phone him for me and ask him what he's playing at?"
"I don't even know him."
"He's in the phone book."
"What's his name I'll give you the number you can phone him."
"I don't know his might be Bob or Roger."
"I think the best thing is to just go home in case you miss him."
"Yes you're right. If you see him, tell him I'll be back home in five minutes."
"I don't know him."
"He's a plumber."
"Yes I know."
"There you are then."
For Chrissakes give me strength!!!!!

iPod now playing - Englishman in New York by Sting


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